Hah!!! You didn't think I was going to let December fly by without so much of a word, did you? Just sat for a 3-hour paper deliberating on how to teach better - tsk* tsk* problem is with the students, really. Despite the fact that the time was too short when we were expected to write four essay-like questions with its little questions too, I think I did okay. Plus, Alan was quoted as saying, "you did really well in a paper just like this one last year," so I'm trying to be positive with this one...heheh (fingers crossed).
Have been busy with Facebook lately just looking at pictures posted by friends and wall-to-wall chats as well as accepting the ever-coming requests I get every other day - really guys, slow it down a little. Friends have been posting up pictures of our days in RESCO and we got comments from all round saying how we missed those days and then BANG! we get a talk-down for doing such things! Everything has to be so critical with some people - OHH PLEEEAASSEE!!!
Anyways, did I forgot to mention that I'm lazying around at someone's house today...? =)
It was one of those rare evenings when my boyfriend and I got together with one of our closest friends (whom are also a couple) to enjoy one of the things we love doing --- eat!
Hazimin & E-Cha
Q-lah & Sam
Feeling the need for something (slightly) raw, we hit Excapade Gadong for some sushi platters – nothing too fancy, easy on the stomach but none of the familiar, daily dishes.
Excapade was packed even on a Wednesday night (must have been “pay” day) and we were left unattended for what, maybe, a full 15-30 minutes. But we weren’t entirely annoyed because we had our “digital” toys to play around with while the waiters and waitresses whizzed past us with colored dishes of raw delicacies on trays over our heads.
aah padas...wasabi ke idung
Sam's digital "toy"
When we finally did place our orders it was nearing 9pm. It was…
“One layer sushi…”
“Seaweed,”
“apa tu ah…baby sutung kh?”
“Baby octopus lahhh…”
“Eh mau lobsta..lobsta ah…kamu mau lobstar..bah lobstar aaa,”
“I want, I want…I want the ice-cream yg kana gore-,”
“?!Ice-cream goreng?!”
So it was that way and poor the waitress that was taking our orders down whom we annoy with our oh-so-(un)cultured ways. Imagine what’ll happen when we start “chop-sticking” our food down...oh the drama of it all!
Macam kenal..tapi di mana ah?
We sent our waitress away with our orders and began fumbling with the digital/SLR cameras again and clicking away, much to our table neighbors’ annoyance. After much poses, one of the waiters came up to us and told us the $15-lobster dish we ordered (the cheapest of it) was not available. He offered the $40-lobster dish, and subsequently the four of us exchanged glances until good-ol’-anything Sam quipped, “Manaja kamu…”
So, the $40-lobster dish it was. Away with that, you sushi-man.
*click click*
“wah…lawa lawa…” giggle-giggle, snicker-snicker
*click click* *click click*
Octus & Weeds...
no no no Sam (shakes head)...we eat that...not place that on our eyes
Q-lah: Cani makan nya bah syg... Sam: aah eksen...abis ni ulih nya...
Our grand finale dish was the $40-lobster which by the time it came we were already full up to our necks but we managed to finish it with the help of our "vacuum" (Q-lah...heheh).
sorry lobster..but you're too good to resist...
Lest, we couldn't take another look at the sight of sushi, the possibilities of seeing what we "downed" a few minutes ago could very well end up right back up. Whilst letting the body do its work with the food, Sam in all his excitement quipped, "Dim-sum next week!"
It's true. I'm the "almost" girl. While the rest of my course mates don on the graduation caps and get their degrees, I get to sit with proud moms and dads and watch them (the graduates) walk up the stage and graduate... ~ ~ ~ Wait...who am I kidding? I'll expectedly vanish for that one day, curl up somewhere, crying and maybe contemplate faking insanity.
You wish.
No, I'll just delve into pity-ness for 5 minutes and then straight into real life, again. Sure it's frustrating to know that the ka-chings won't be rolling in anytime soon, but I think I'll manage nevertheless. I bid adieu to the fellow graduates and wish them good luck (I think you're going to need it), but still, no, you won't see me lingering about the Chancellor Hall or the uni premises on grad-day.
So in about a week's time, I'll be back on campus, still as a student amongst many fresh faces starting uni, too. Oh, boy, what a day I'm (not) looking forward to.
Getting left behind a year is just that - a delay in a phase of life. It's not failure in any kind of sense of the word. Besides, like I said - I am the "almost" girl. I almost failed, but I didn't.
I have never cried so much for so long about something I don't even own or have yet.
It hurts to know that what I have, may very much hurt the love that I very much would like to bring up in the future with my love one. To hurt a little one like that, to see that the little one might have to go through what I have gone through, is all almost the same as not giving my little one a life that it deserves...no, I cannot let it be.
I am not ungrateful. I am not bitter about life, or hopes. I just don't want him/her to live a life constantly asking, "Why me?". I don't want to cry myself to sleep every other night, knowing that I caused him/her pain; I don't want to keep telling him/her to be strong because I never had the strength to tell myself that I was or am strong enough; I don't want to say to him/her maybe there's a reason why, because even after so long, there have been so many, yet none that answered the question, my question, "Why me?"
But yet, in a glimmer of hope and prayers, I will always tell myself, "Maybe, it will be okay..."
"I would give up my life so that you could have a better life..."
Infidelity – a topic well too familiar yet one that can never invite honest or even absolute solutions despite years of its existence (if you can call it that). And it seems too easy to always want to blame the third party, so we do it. We blame that third person for everything. Maybe so.
A friend recently confessed that things aren’t so rosy between her and her man because of a third person in the picture. After all things explained and what-not, she said that her man was not to blame. It begged the question, “Why (blame) her only?”
Have we become so naïve, so desperate enough to not see that it takes two; that our men, when caught in situations as such, are just as accountable to the (mis)deeds as that of the 3rd person? Are we so willing to let a deceptive boyfriend stay by our side just to show the 3rd person that they have not won?
Regardless of whether we are willing to turn a blind eye and accept the caught-cheating boyfriend back or not, I’m not sure justice is done if we just point our fingers at that third person completely. It is not to say that I advocate acts of infidelity or should my man ever cheats on me, I’m not going to blame it on the other girl – I am inclined to do so (blame the other girl). But I’d also be inclined to point my finger at my man.
The point to this is that if you are going to blame somebody, don’t cut your man off some slack. So don’t listen to your girlfriends trying to convince you that the other girl is to be blamed wholeheartedly and believe that he was not the one who started it. A cheating boyfriend and another girl is just what it is – two people slapping you in the face. Might as well slap them BOTH back.
There aren't many things I'd ask for in life but if someone would have asked me what I would really like to have (preferably if given free =p), then these would definitely be in my "Christmas" list:
1. Apple iMac 20"/24" (...making its way into my arms soon...)
Wishlist No. 1 - check! =D
1. Apple iMac 27-inch Thunderbolt - an upgrade? =D
2. Volkswagon Touareg R50 in Black or Champagne
3. Come, See & Conquer Rome (...will revel in Rome's beauty by end of November...)
4. 1 TB External Hard Disk Drive- preferably LaCie's
5. Fossil's Dress Watch - Check! But of a different design...
Fossil Jesse Ceramic Watch in White
6. Fossil's Stella Multifunction Resin Watch in White & Gold - ...my heart still aches for this...
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